Nigerians!! In These Tough Times, We Need To Shed Our Individualism

This is my first article for the year, and I apologize for starting on this note. My first writing for the year should have started pleasantly. One of those extolling 'Self-Love' and the many talks of how you should be gentler in the new year, be more proactive, take it easy, forgive yourself, and all of that, but since we are not 'Greeing for anybody this year,' I am starting my year this way. 

But then again, you should trust me because I have something like that in my drafts. Still, while scrolling through Twitter last night, I came across a user's comment saying, 'Our growth as Nigerians lies in us ditching our individualism as a society and embracing communal living. That struck a chord, and just like that, I knew I had something to write about. However, before I get into all of that writing, let me offer you some context. 

This takes me back to the very first time I stepped into Lagos. It was more like a rude awakening. I have never had to battle with traffic jams, plan my time around traffic, and all of those theatrics, but getting a job and having no choice but to move from one of the quietest states in the country to the 'Center of Excellence' meant that I had to automatically adapt to a lot of things. It was not like we lived in Paradise, but we were more orderly.

I still remember that afternoon very clearly. I got into Lagos, and the chaos shocked me. This must be something other than the famed Lagos. In all its glory, 'Eko Akete' cannot be like this. In fact, it is still a wonder to me how we survive in this place. Was it the heat? Which, of course, we are still battling with; or was it the blasting speakers, cursing drivers, traffic, etc. It was just a whole lot and so different for me. I thought about all these happening but still needed to prepare for them. 

I remember being so scared at the time that I took a Bolt from Ojota Bus Stop to Shomolu, which was just around its corner. A few months later, I still laugh at myself when I became fully aware of that distance. Why did I need to pay a Bolt driver for that distance? For the first two months, It was super uncomfortable for me to see people dead on the streets with no one giving a damn till the authorities came to clear them. I saw two of those bodies in the first month, and I even came across the mangled body of another on the rail tracks when I missed my bus stop on one of those days. 

I could not understand why people seemed to pay so much attention to themselves while intentionally oblivious to the next person. The reality of the many tales of robberies happening in the full glare of everyone in the marketplace, with no one paying attention, hit me. Your phone could be snatched, and everyone would go on as if nothing happened. 'Ja ara e, Eko Lo n Pebi.' Try looking at the horizon; everything looked like scenes from an apocalyptic movie.

Nah, this is no way to live. We prefer to live closed off in our gated estates without caring for anybody. We already have terrible government systems and build things to help ourselves, but we remain ready targets and vulnerable if we must remember to build in communities. Our sense of individualism hurts us collectively in the long run, and we must do away with that. Now let me show you ideally how that can be made possible. 

'Olowo Kan Laarin Otosi Mefa, O di Otosi Meje' (A Rich man amid 6 poor men makes it a group of 7 poor men')

Photo by Vonecia Carswell on Unsplash

We have Veteran Singer Jaywon's lyrical dexterity to show for that line, but in recent times, nothing rings true. A rich man among 6 poor men makes up 7 poor men. As a result of the terrible leadership we have had to battle with as Nigerians, a situation in which we are not entirely innocent, we have had to create convenience systems by ourselves. 

We have learned to grade our estate roads, fix and clear our gutters, sink boreholes, and run them into our houses and outside for our neighbours to fetch. We have contributed to our community security and even took it a notch higher by contributing to buying transformers for our electricity distribution companies whenever we are unfortunate to have our street transformers get spoilt. 

These are not our roles as citizens; that is not how the arrangement should be; those moves are our survival instincts. After all, man is expected to survive in the best way possible. In an ideal setting, as citizens, we are only to pay taxes, cast votes during elections, and be law-abiding while waiting for our elected officials to do the very basics we expect of them. However, we have had to battle this chronic leadership problem because of where we have found ourselves as Nigerians. 

Now, back to 'Olowo Kan...'; while I understand the dynamics of Nigerian society, the extent of our interrelationship and how it is reflected through tribal and ethnic sentiments, I am a strong advocate for extending hands of friendship and supporting each other in tough times, like we have now. When the times were simpler, getting help from fellow Nigerians was easier. A tired and properly sun-baked man walking on the streets was quickly attended to by total strangers out of pure concern. 

As I stroll in my hood this evening, one of the voices booming out of the many speakers in the nearby church corroborates my stance. It was easier for us to help each other when the times were better, but now we live and relate with each other while remaining strongly suspicious. As a person, stretching out hands of support and building communal capacity is a way of breaking that persistent cycle of poverty and building a more robust generation. 

A couple of my friends are already finding ways to pool resources together and pay attention to those at the lowest rung of our society. Those that have been largely ignored, and my respect for them grows every day. This is because to muster the strength and the willpower to keep doing in these times is nothing short of admirable. After all, 'A lone rich man in a group of poor people is also a poor man.' 

And so, do we ignore our individuality and focus on others? 

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

If you are a writer, you understand my position with this article. I have gotten to a rough spot as I have found solid arguments for individualistic and communal structures, and I can't ignore these factual arguments. So what do I do? 'I get strong head', so we proceed. On a more serious note, how do we properly advocate for an increase in our communal capacity as Nigerians? According to cross-cultural psychology, the individualistic culture prioritizes the individual over the community. 

Personal goals, self-independence, self-reliance, and a particular obsession with privacy, amongst other attributes, are features of folks in a culture that prioritizes individualism. Countries/Societies like the United Kingdom, United States, Australia, etc, are known to practice this form of living. However, this is different from our ideal pattern of living in Nigeria, but we are moving towards more individualism. 

We used to be closer, and we trusted each other better. In fact, our traditional communities spoke of this in proverbs, songs, and other means of communication back then. As a society, we readily helped ourselves and looked after each other, but the level of distrust is now so high that everyone is recoiling into their shell, and we are all hurting in the process. So, while this might encourage self-expression, allow for a renewed celebration of diversity, and focus on personal development, we are fast becoming a low-trust society. 

This is reflected in how we lack cohesiveness; we can hardly aggregate our voices and demand for change, and we collectively lack empathy as a society. The terrible leaders we already have now see more loopholes to exploit. We already live in isolation, so the job is half done. We might have all turned to social media for succour now, and every video, post, meme, etc., is championing individuality and asking us all to focus on ourselves; this is not our actual reality. 

And right there is the paradox of individualism. It is important to prioritize yourself, feel like yourself, and chase after growth. However, we need that support structure to live effectively as individuals, which we all miss out on. 

'The Individual is Foolish, but the Species is Wise' - Friedrich Hayek 

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

Now, away from that talk on the paradox of individualism and focusing on this quote that I just gleaned from the internet but perfectly summarises my discussion, it is safe to posit that as Nigerians, we are individually brilliant but collectively foolish. This is reflected in our leadership, the manner we canvass for proper governance, how we chastise our leaders, and ultimately, how we defend our rights as a people. 

You could go on scrolling endlessly on social, listening to the many opinions and properly curated social accounts, talking about discovering your identity, embracing your individuality, and investing in being the best version of yourself. But while this is true, we need proper social support structures as Nigerians. We need to look inward and embrace our communities. 

We cannot exist outside of our traditional systems. Our customary practices, norms, rules, etc., represent our forbears' accumulated experiences. In Nigeria, Africans chose to do things as a community, and they were right. Our continuous obsession with individuality implies that we could find a way to exist outside of history, place and culture. This needs to be corrected. 

Many people have not learned how much I want this country to work. My friend Francis will tell me idealism is a mirage, and maybe he is right. There will always be interests, but our sense of community, individuals drawing strength from their communities to better express themselves, should be the norm. We might seem different as Nigerians, but we are still the same. If you look closely, you see the traces of similarity among us. 

In a world, in a life that keeps giving, anything is possible. My greatest wish is for us as Nigerians to rediscover our collective culture, and we need to focus on what binds us together rather than what separates us. The Lenten season is rounding up, and the holy month of Ramadan is starting; hopefully, we will better embrace our communities this season.